Hello, loyal reader. Are you in the friend zone? Do you want to go from ‘just friends’ to ‘getting skins’? Good, because Nova is here to help you. After reading this, you will go from ‘just a buddy’ to ‘getting some cutty’.
First, let’s tackle the most likely problem. The most common problem is the person you’re interested in looks at you like a brother/sister. That is probably because you listen to their relationship problems and are their personal sponge. You soak up all of their problems, they squeeze you and you drench out what they want to hear. THAT is where you messed up. First of all, NO man should want to listen to a woman about HER relationship problems. That either makes you look brotherly or gay. In fact, she probably looks at you like her gay brother. Women, in your case – you shouldn’t want to hear about HIS relationship problems. That is what he has sisters and/or female cousins for. How can they look at you in a sexual manner after you’re the ear for their tears?
Being the G I am, I don’t know how it is to be in the friend zone. But, I can teach you how to get into the end zone (scoring!!!). You have to get your sexy back (no Justin Timberlake). In other words, you have to re-create yourself in their eyes. Next time they want to share their relationship issues with you, tell them “I’ve got my own problems”. It may sound cruel, but show your assertiveness. Let that whining wimp know that you’re not the company for their misery.
Now, that you’ve let them know that your nuts hang (or your nips hang in regard to the ladies) – its time for action. Most importantly, anything that is always available loses value. Stop being so available. When they call, hit ‘ignore’ and text them back. Whenever you talk to them, either let them know what you’ve just got finished doing or are about to do. Be fake busy and watch them want your company. Better yet, start hanging out with someone else of your opposite sex. If you can’t do that, just say that you are. Have you noticed that a lot of times people don’t let you know they’re interested in you until they see you with someone else? This is the logic we’re using here. Nova knows.
By now, you should have cut down on how much you supply yourself and increased your demand. Now, when you come around – make sure you look and smell your best. You can’t make your long awaited return with the aura of a gym sock. No. Step your fresh up. Wear a new outfit and some new scents even if it’s only for a visit. When you see them again, feel out the situation. Don’t get caught up in idle conversation. Then, LEAVE. Yes. Leave early. It is always better to under stay your welcome than to overstay it. You’ve just made a whole new impression.
Guess what? You’re sexy now. Don’t mess it up. Wait for THEM to contact you. The next time you visit, set up an activity to where you’ll eventually be alone. Not just alone, but alone with liquor. Grandma was right when she told you “liquor is quicker”. Why do you think Gramps had all those children before she had running water? I digress – lets get back to the subject at hand. After you’re both a little tipsy, ask them how they REALLY feel about you. Let them know that you’re interested in them. Most likely, they’ll let you know they feel the same way (NOW they do). Congratulations!!! You’re out of the friend zone!
On the contrary, if that doesn’t work and they look at you like a weirdo – you’re still fine. All you have to do is blame it on the alcohol. Back to the friend zone you go. It is better to try and fail than to never have tried at all. What did you REALLY lose?
